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Thursday, September 02, 2004Andrew Sullivan has a devastating critique of Zell Miller's speech last night, along with faint praise of Dick Cheney. Damn. UPDATE: The Wall Street Journal disagrees with his characterization of Miller as a Dixiecrat. Sullivan also mentions Mitt Romney's speech, which included, because every child deserves a mother and a father, we step forward by recognizing that marriage is between a man and a woman.A.S.: That's an interesting standard. If every child deserves a father and a mother, then surely we have to take the children of single mothers away from them and give them to approved couples; or we have to make divorce much more difficult; or we have to ban adoption by single people; or we have to prevent the care of children by their grandparents and any other variation on the nuclear family. (Emphasis mine.) According to my mother, a divorce attorney in Indiana, that is exactly what's happening. The legislature has agreed on all sorts of hoops to jump through-- err, counseling options-- before one can get divorced. For people in the heartland, it's not just an anti-gay agenda, but the desire to keep the womenfolk barefoot and pregnant and stuck in loveless marriages. For the children, of course. Because having a stable childhood is the Most Important Thing Ever, since you'll end up as a Valium-gulping housewife anyway, due to the fact that you can't get un-hitched because of your children's unhappiness. Circular logic: noun. See circular logic. posted by Nate on 1:03 AM link Wednesday, September 01, 2004Serious-looking, suit-wearing, scowling Kobe Bryant has rape charges dismissed. 
That look says to me: I am disrespectful to dirt. Can you see I am serious? Get out of my way, all of you! This is no place for loafers. Join me or die. Can you do any less? UPDATE: Lester Munson has more. For lucky best wash, use Mr. Sparkle. posted by Nate on 11:59 PM link Tuesday, August 31, 2004The left has Michael Moore. We have Ah-nold. The Gov-ah-nah of Cah-li-Vornia. This is an Ernie Broglio for Lou Brock trade if you ask me. An unapologetic anti-socialist European immigrant who escaped Communist Rule and, through hard work and luck, became a multimillionaire and role model and married a Kennedy, versus a U.S. born white male artiste who despises the advantages the U.S. gave him and wishes he lived in Europe and would rather eat free government cheese with Pierre Bordieu while discussing the literary career of Marcel Proust or something or other. No contest. I'm opposed to amending the "native-born" Constitutional clause for presidential eligibility, but the sheer optimism of Arnold might make me reconsider in 2008. When contrasting him versus Hilary! four years from now, I hope that the Evil Future Robots come back to "remove" Mrs. Clinton from the presidential race for the good of all mankind. Sure we'll lose out on Universal Healthcare, but we'll have Julius Benedict in charge of the economy. "Thank you for the cookies. I look forward to tossing them." posted by Nate on 11:45 PM link Monday, August 30, 2004I caught a bit of the Republican Convention tonight. Apparently all the television producers, film school students, and any and all media saavy people in general vote Democrat, since the production value was terrible. Cheesy late eighties vertical blind and and checkerboard dissolves, overindulgent keyboard music, fake reporters hyping some non-event. It reminded me of junior high when we'd get rounded into the gymnasium for a Special Presentation about date rape or heroin or cigarettes; the presenters knew how to talk street, man, but it was obvious that they were merely dorks trying to sound cool. Couldn't the GOP have put P.J. O'Rourke and Jonah Goldberg in charge of this shindig? Everyone would be twisted out of their mind on gin and MDMA and grooving on Simpsons reruns, but it would be compelling television. The other thing that bothered me is the continuing theme from 2000 that the Republicans are Inclusive, Dammit. A Muslim cleric gave the opening invocation, and women and minorities were everywhere. It creeped me out, especially the black Evangelical choir. Show a little subtlety next time, guys. Having a Rod Paige or Heather Wilson is fine, but this was like putting a billboard in Times Square saying, "The NEW and IMPROVED G.O.P.-- Now With 50% More Skirts and Negroes!" (By the way, why aren't any Hispanics scheduled to speak in prime time? I thought this was W's biggest group of minority supporters.) Sometimes I miss the unapologetic, oldschool WASPy three-martini-lunch Republican Party. Sure I wouldn't be included because I'm Irish and Italian and Catholic and Poor, but I can dream, can't I? So in honor of the Old Republican Guard, tonight I'm getting eyeballs deep in a bottle of single malt scotch and smoking my aristocratic-looking tobacco pipe. I may even chuckle wryly at an exceedingly witty anecdote from The Collected Essays of William F. Buckley, Jr. and bemusedly contemplate how Ayn Rand would deal with welfare reform. If I only had an ascot or a yacht or a rich father who kept me out of Vietnam, I'd be set. posted by Nate on 11:14 PM link Sunday, August 29, 2004They say that cat Shaft is one bad mother-- Hush yo' mouth. Cats are cool, especially when they wear ridiculous clothing. Comic gold, using the images from this cat clothier. posted by Nate on 1:51 PM link
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your stolen base are belong to Rickey Henderson. Questions or comments? Email nate@swankypimp.com |
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